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“One of the things that makes this essay is her tone,” he said.“It could have been, ‘Princeton should be poorer,’ but she opens it as an inquiry.For anyone looking to inspire their own children or grandchildren who are seeking to go to college in the fall of 2014, these four essays would be a good place to start.
“I wonder if Princeton should be poorer.”If you’re a high school senior trying to seduce the admissions officer reading your application essay, this may not strike you as the ideal opening line.
But Shanti Kumar, a senior at the Bronx High School of Science, went ahead anyway when the university prompted her to react in writing to the idea of “Princeton in the nation’s service and in the service of all nations.”Back in January, when I asked high school seniors to send in college application essays about money, class, working and the economy, I wasn’t sure what, if anything, would come in over the transom.
I was not the upper-middle-class kid on Park Avenue. Instead of diplomas and accolades, my parents’ room emits a smell from the restaurant uniforms they wear seven days a week, all year round.”Mr. And her essay for Hamilton College, which she will attend in the fall, centers on her desire to serve in the Peace Corps.
It opens with a joke about her hating clowns and leeches and tells a sad story of a visit to the Dominican Republic, where her father refused to let her play with the destitute boy next door.
“But here’s somebody who knows he can make it work with intelligence and humor.”Indeed, Mr. “It originates in a critical habit of mind, and the kind of mind that is in this essay is going to play out extremely well in any class that he’s in.”Admissions professionals often warn people not to think that they can write their way into the freshman class.
Cranberg’s essay includes asides about applicants’ gullibility and the college that sent him a DHL “priority” envelope, noting inside that he was a priority to the college. “The essay is one document that, even in the best of circumstances, is written by an individual telling one story,” said Shawn Abbott, the assistant vice president for undergraduate admissions at New York University.
What she does is that she listens very carefully to what you have assigned her to do, and as a response to that, she says, ‘Well, let me ask you this! Kumar will take the stage as Marty in the Bronx Science production of “Grease,” and she’ll collect her diploma on June 21. “She is that person who is always going to give an interesting answer, even to the most boring question,” he said.
In the fall, she’ll attend Cornell, for which she wrote no essays about the university’s level of affluence.
I told its spokesman, Martin Mbugua, that other schools had commented on their own applicants once the students gave them permission, but he was unmoved. Kumar suggested that her grades might not have been quite high enough, but Mr.
Bauld contended that Princeton should have been swayed by her words.